Monday, September 17, 2012

Perfectionist

I had a very different post in mind for this week, but was inspired to write something different.  I recently took a personality assessment of sorts for my day job.  After 28 or so questions, it came back with what was already pretty obvious to me.  I...am a perfectionist.  Some quotes from my results:

'...like to be accurate and orderly and they make decisions in an analytical way.'
'...important for them to understand the parameters of a problem before they tackle it.'
'...tend to use a systematic approach to solve the problem.'
'...often want to assure the accuracy of their work.'

Definitely not a surprise to me.  I like rules and set expectations, and have high standards for quality.  What did surprise me was the correlation I found in this to how I knit.

I was reading a post by a fellow blogger, DestiKNITions (just started reading but loving it already - definitely recommend!)  In this post, she describes realizing halfway through a pattern that she kept missing the k2tog in the pattern, and missed it every time.  As a result, the pattern was not coming along as expected.  She briefly debated about whether to frog it (rip it apart) or to keep going and push through, hoping it wouldn't be obvious. In her next post, as she described how she kept going and pushed through the error, I wanted to scream 'No!!!'.

While I'm quite sure her project turned out beautifully, and I may not have been able to tell if I didn't already know about it, I have never been one to ignore an error and not rip it out completely.  I have been halfway through an afghan and ripped it completely out because of a consistent mistake I made on every row, and my biggest pride on that is the finished afghan turned out perfectly!  I have a pair of socks where I realized after finishing that there was one big stitch on the bottom where I knit too loosely, and I didn't end up giving those away as a Christmas gift as originally planned because that one flaw bothered me too much.  I've also taken a 3/4 finished scarf and a 2/3 finished afghan and pulled them completely apart because I just didn't like how they turned out.  I have my first attempt at an article of clothing (a beaded spaghetti strap shirt) in my 'drawer of shame' because I'm pretty sure it would only fit an extremely oddly shaped woman, rather than the normal figure of the friend I tried to make it for.  I have made a sample knit for my local yarn shop that looks flawless, but I can only see the one tiny error I made that I'm positive no one else even notices.

I'm not shocked that my 'work personality' is so similar to my...well, it's all just my general personality.  I'm more forgiving of mistakes that others make and cannot accept my own.  I would rather undo hours of knitting to make sure the finished product is as close to flawless as I can get, I will read through a pattern completely to make sure I understand all requirements and instructions, and if I'm faced with a knitting question at my local yarn shop that I cannot answer, it bothers me for weeks after.

I guess where I'm landing on this (after many rambling paragraphs) is that I envy those who can push through an 'error' and just focus on the end product, appreciating that it became something different than originally intended and that it can be beautiful in it's own right.  My hope is that my obsession with perfection will make my pattern designs easy to follow and as flawless as possible!

Until next time, here are some gratuitous yarn shots.  One touch of this yarn, and I've spent a week trying to find a pattern to make with it to justify my inevitable purchase of a large quantity of it. So soft, I just want to lay on it...

Misti Alpaca Chunky


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